When
conflict happens between you and another person look at your part in the deal
and face the conflict. Ignoring and
resisting conflict won’t make it go away.
Working
and living with other people generates joy, frustration and irritation. Express appreciation for the joy and address
unresolved conflict. A lack of either or
both will create resentment and fuel conflict.
Maybe
you have someone that “rubs you the wrong way” or maybe someone offended you 13
years ago or last month and your typical approach is to get even by not
speaking or acting rude. This approach
is a lousy strategy for peace – peace of mind especially.
It
takes guts and honesty mixed with courtesy to speak up when you feel
offended. But that is your part in the
deal.
Try
this - “When you this or that I told myself this or that. I know it’s my responsibility to share what’s
up for me so can we have a respectful discussion about this?” Courtesy, courage and kindness are the
perfect combination to approaching conflict.
You can’t make anyone do anything but you can choose your actions and
reactions to everything.
Don’t
continue to lay the groundwork for war by setting a trap to ambush the other
guy. Go direct, avoid being accusatory
and work to resolve the conflict. War is
expensive, people get hurt.
Remember,
remain open to feedback and lessen your defensiveness when others muster up
their courage and bring you issues they have with you.
So
what’s it going to be – war or peace?
Still
learning,
Honey
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